So Nash's 3rd Birthday is tomorrow (10/11) and this whole weekend has been a hard time for him and there have been a lot of tears. It started with a happy and exciting visit from Grandma who has been out of town for two weeks. Nash was excited but overwhelmed and we we're out of routine. We all took the kids to the get Halloween costumes. They had wanted to go to this local Halloween Store which only is open for Halloween. I didn't think there senses would ever recover had we done that, so we made a compromise and went to a party store. On the way to the store we talked about how do we handle when we hear something or see something we may not like. Covering our ears and eyes and letting Mommy and Daddy know. (as opposed to SCREAMING and running around) In some situations we feel may be hard for one or both of the kids my husband and I each take one, meaning we are buddy's with that ONE child. So no matter what if it gets crazy we know we are each covered with our attention on one child as much as possible. On this day Nash was with my husband and Wyatt was with me and Grandma was a second pair of hands for whoever needed them. So the inevitable happened when we arrived Nash was upset the moment we got to the door. There was a fake statue that had a arm that moved a sword up and down and then at the same time we walked in they started filling the balloons and the air made a lot of noise. It was down hill from there. We knew it could happen for one or both boys. The rest of the morning was hard for Nash and he took hours to recover from the while experience. Bless his heart, he tried, he really wanted to look at costumes and we did end up picking one out he loves so we will see.
Tonight we met up with some family to have dinner at Nash's restaurant of choice, Red Robin to celebrate his Birthday. He is having a joint Birthday Party with his brother Wyatt, at Chuck E Cheese at the end of the month. But we wanted to do something to celebrate now of course. It was hard, this whole weekend has been hard. I think there is just so much going on. He tried to put on a smile for everyone and we made sure to tell the waitress we would love a sundae and balloon but no singing please. We learned that last year.
He opened some gifts and he got the the much anticipated Thomas Shake Shake Bridge from Misty Island and Frosty Friends DVD and a few other Thomas things. He cheered up a little after that holding his Shakey Bridge as he calls it. He would rather skip ice cream and head home to play with his new train set. So Dad and Wyatt helped him eat it and home we went home.
Its so hard this time of year, its my absolute favorite time of year. I LOVE FALL in the Pacific Northwest. I love the holidays, and especially my boys Birthdays. However its hard on the kids. To much excitement, sensory overload, expectations with family and friends and just off routine as a whole. We try really hard to make accommodations to celebrate how the kids want, but sometimes unless we just pass the day by like any another day its just inevitable that its going to be a hard time....a fun.....but hard time.
Here is a great link, while now Sensory Integration Disorder is known as Sensory Processing disorder this link still has great info and tips when it comes to Birthday Party's and SPD!
As I mentioned earlier, we have a joint birthday coming up. Both my boys said they wanted a party at Chuck E Cheese. ONE party is the answer for us when both birthdays are about 30'ish days apart. We compromised and each boy is allowed to invite one friend/family and of course then our family of course. We have a table we will have reserved and I already am thinking about what types of accommodations we will need to make. Such as Chuck E Cheese himself (aka some young teenager in a costume) comes out to join the birthday children and dance, play and sing. Well while Wyatt will warm up to this idea and has a love hate relationship with this type of fun at parties....Nash wont have anything to do with it. So we will make sure we get 5 minutes notice before *chuck E* comes out so Nash can go play with a family member someplace across the room and not have to see him.
We also will sing Happy Birthday to Wyatt and Nash but Nash wont be there. He will continue playing and enjoying himself just across the room. But never fear, cake will be had and presents will be opened.
So one might ask. Then why have your kids party at such a volital sensory overloaded place? Because they do like many of the aspects of the Chuck E Cheese party experience. As a family if we can adapt and make accommodations, why scrap the WHOLE experience when we can just try to tailor it to our families needs. I always think ahead and plan, I make sure I ask myself, is it unreasonable for me to ask for these types of accommodations. What will happen if I dont ask for them? and if we choose not to ask for them or they cant make the accommodations whats plan B. Sometimes that plan B is to scrap the plan all together. But usually like many things, compromises can be made. Everyone can enjoy some aspect of the party and we hope for the best. After all, we could treat it like any other day....but its not, its a super special day, and nothings better than making that super special day all about them and whats best for them! :)
~ Kristen
PS: Sorry if this post is a little scattered, I started it this afternoon and finished it tonight. I am tired, and I too am overwhelmed a little. Lots of emotions when it comes to your "Babys" and having birthday parties or celebrations that are hard for them but at the same time just that a celebration of something important to us and more someday them.
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